Friday, August 31, 2012

Bear Shoulders

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I had been mulling over the idea of getting a tattoo for a while now. There are two major personality roadblocks, though, that were impeding me. 1. I am remarkably fickle, and am notorious for not being able to make up my mind. Though, on the other hand, I am have a remarkable ability to dive head first and become completely, possibly overly, passionate about certain things. Go figure. And 2. I am a huge sap who turns everything into a metaphor. So, if I was going to get a tattoo, it had better be good and meaningful. I kicked around a few ideas, the first of which being a bear, just because I thought it would be awesome. Then I moved toward literature - maybe a Vonnegut sketch? I went through a big long process and ended up pretty much where I began - with a bear. It just felt right, you know? That sounds kind of silly. I guess, it's partly because I want to move to California, because I'm stuck right now some place I don't want to be, because I can't have nature around me right now so I got a little bit placed on me instead. And also, I really like bears. So, there you have it. There is a bear on my shoulder and I am so pleased. Also, excuse me while I wear this outfit forever and become that weird kid that wears the exact same clothes to school every single day. YOU CAN'T STOP ME.

Dress: Zara, Sweater: H&M, Desert Boots: Clarks

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Until tomorrow,

Monday, August 27, 2012

Walk On

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I don't have too much to say right now, which I'm sure will come as a shock to you guys who are used to huge, type-y blocks of text adorned with a few photos to soften the word-blow. Honestly, part of me was hoping to be away from the computer for the most part this week, since it's my last full week of summer before school starts up. I got this idea in my head - and take note, because this is a dumb idea - that spending my last days of summer on the computer, scrolling through tumblr, slowly becoming obsessed with Parks & Recreation while other folks my age keep hyper-busy and super-duper social would make me some sort of inadequate. See, I told you that was dumb, so I hoped you paid attention when I said "look, this is going to be dumb." Not to get all quotey on you or anything (but come on, who am I kidding) whenever I get like this, this feeling of "If you're not busy every second you are 100% wasting your life," I remember that quote, I think it's by Teddy Roosevelt (let's hear it for T. Roze, am I right?), that says "Comparison is the thief of joy." What it boils down to, is that everyone is allowed to make their own pathways toward feeling good. If I want to spend a day watching an entire series, if that will make me feel good, then HECK YEAH I should do that. If I want to climb a mountain, HECK YEAH, MOUNTAINS. If I want to keep super busy and work and work and then be super social afterwards every night then, honestly probably not but, HECK YEAH. So, I just hope this week I'll focus more on what'll make me happiest, not what other people are doing, and stop comparing myself. That's the thief of joy, you know.

Also, just wanted to make a clothes-related remark here. Shocking, I know. It's not like this is a daily style blog or anything. But, my dear, dear friend Elanor sent me what is probably the best tote bag ever, and I can't stop wearing it, and I mostly took these outfit photos so I could show you guys how good it is, and sort of brag I guess.

Denim top, jeans: Levi's, Striped top: JCrew Sale, Bag: ELANOR! Sandals: Wanted

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Until tomorrow,

Friday, August 24, 2012

Wild One

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This week has been long and short at the same time. I've been getting back into the groove of daily life, thinking and thinking and then thinking again, having some of the best conversations, some mostly sleepless nights, and some of the biggest belly laughs. On my day off Wednesday, I wanted to a little bit of head clearing-upping, so I decided to drive up to a state park I hadn't been to before - Franklin Delano Roosevelt State Park. It was pretty lovely to walk around all of the fields and tree-shaded pathways. We searched and searched for a path to the lake, and when we finally found it, it didn't disappoint. I spent a while just sitting on the lone bench they'd placed beside it, watching the mostly-still reflection of the trees on the water surface, glancing over at the man and his golden dog playing fetch with a real stick. It was nice, but I couldn't fight the urge to drive a half hour further north, to Bear Mountain. I've talked about this place so many times on my blog now, that you may remember it. Honestly, the top of Bear Mountain is one of the places I feel most right, most at home. It was a relief to see those rocks and that tree-swept sky and that watchtower. Sitting on that rock ledge and just breathing and looking made me feel so much more at ease, even if just for a little while. I could have stayed there for an awfully long time, and right now I mostly wish I was back on that rock ledge, just listening and looking. I've never seen it at night. Guess I'll just have to make a trip back. If it wasn't an hour and a half drive away, I would probably be there at least once a week. It's weird to think how a place I didn't even know existed this time last year has become such a comfort to me. Hopefully someday I'll get to live somewhere where the mountains and forests aren't as far away as they are here.

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Until tomorrow,

Thursday, August 23, 2012

The Post About Me Meeting Disney Characters That You Never Knew You Wanted

I think that title sums things up quite well. Because I like you guys, I saved the best disney post for the last disney post. I'm going to try to both start and end things on a high note.

1. Russell and Dug. Now, you may notice if you look to the center of the photo that Russell and I are not just holding hands, but out fingers are laced. Laced. This is because Russell walked up to me, hugged me, then proceeded to take me over to his backpack, where he picked up a piece of rope (this is where I got concerned) and tied it around my actual ring finger in order to propose to and/or marry me. This prompted the photographer to condescendingly remark, "He's only eight you know." To which I exclaimed "HEY, HE PROPOSITIONED ME." What can I say.


2. Princess Aurora. Not my most favorite, but she was very nice and told my sister and I that we must have wonderful fairies, because we are so well dressed. Does this mean I'm a real fashion blogger now?


3. MARIE. She's a lady -fluffs chin whiskers-


I am 5 years old.


5. Alice. She asked if I could talk to flowers, and when I said "I wish" she said, "Oh well, it's not hard at all. Just talk to them! The trouble is getting them to talk back."


6. The Mad Hatter. When we posed, he said in the most perfect voice, "1, 2, 3 MUSTHHARD" and I made this face


7. Now, some classic folks. Mickey! He was so classily dressed.


8. Minnie. Cheryl was excited to finally meet her. I don't know what the hell is supposed to be going on behind us, though.


9. Donald. He was so pushy. He literally pushed me away from him after we took our photo. He means business.


10. Oh god, Goofy. I don't know why, but as we were waiting, I kept getting more and more creeped out by Goofy. That hat, those patchy pants, his showing midriff. To top it off, he was the only character who hugged me, and his armpits were so. sweaty. THE SWEAT.


11. Oh hey, Eeyore. And my mom.


12. Piglet, my spirit animal.


13. And last but not least, Pooh Bear. Pooh was kind of flirtacious, okay. He kissed me on the head not once but twice, and kept lingering. Here is the progression of my emotions:




What a charmer.

Until tomorrow,

Wednesday, August 22, 2012

Bubbling Over

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I was walking to the diner the other day, and the temperature was perfect, like summer had begun to pull out it’s autumn clothes from under-the-bed storage. I was in a real huff about everything - what do I want to do with my life, who do I want to love and be loved by, where do I want to go, what do I want to experience. Just a regular Tuesday night, you know. And then, this boy biked past me quite quickly, and I heard a woman in a nightgown sweep sweep sweeping her front porch, and a breeze licked me right on the shoulder, and it hit me a little too hard that I’ve lived in the same place for my entire life. Except for, literally, one night in freshman year when I braved a dorm room, I’ve been in the same house, in the same city, in the same state my entire life. Whenever I meet someone new, and hear about where they’ve lived, where they grew up, where they intend to go next, it catapults me yelling and kicking into the sky, thoughts and decisions whizzing by me as I sort of spiral back down. Walking down my same old block, I thought about how four years ago, there was no way I wanted to go away to college, how two years ago there was no way I was going to study abroad. The problem is, it seems, that we have to make decisions for our future selves (possibly almost entirely different folk) in the present. We can only assume what we want now is what we will want in a weeks, six months, four years time. I am not the same person I was when I started college. I look sort of like her, with better clothing choices most of the time, but I’ve grown and warped and developed and learned so much about myself and what I want, become someone so, so miraculously different. First, I was scared, really scared, by the things I didn’t do, by the things other folks my age have done and done again a million times. But then I got a different sort of scared, the one I think people call “good scared.” That fear that I imagine one has when they’re about to skydive for the first time or bungee jump or hike to the top of a huge mountain. A slight fear of failing, but predominantly the excitement of seeing something entirely new, or something familiar in an extraordinary way. I began to think of how big the world is, and to bubble over with thoughts of interning somewhere I’ve never been before, somewheres I’ve never been before, living, working, meeting, dancing, party rocking, loving, in a bunch of somewheres I haven’t been yet. I’m not sure exactly what I want, but every now and then these moments of fear and possibility pop up and I figure it out just a little bit more. This is not everything I wanted to say, exactly how I wanted to say it. I’m terrified of moving, terrified of never finding love or recognizing that I am a person who deserves certain things, and I’ve sort of spent the past few days mulling things over, watching lots of Doctor Who, and convincing myself that I am charming and not weird in an all-together off-putting way. But this is me, growing, and growing, at least a little bit more.

Sorry for the break in disney posts. I was feeling what experts often call "quite thinky" and felt the need to write and share, and this outfit sort of fit my feelings in a weird sort of way. Don't worry though, the post of me with 8,000 disney characters will be coming along shortly.

Dress: JCPenney, Sweater: H&M, Boots: Lucky Brand

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Until tomorrow,

Tuesday, August 21, 2012

Bibbidi Bobbidi Boo

Here are some outfits from Disney World, folks. In typical (and literal) Nicole fashion, I didn't bring practical footwear, and my feet are still grumpy about it. Sorry, feet. I went through a lot of outfits this trip, and my favorites were the ones I threw together in fits of post-nap confusion. I'll let you figure out which those are.

1. Dress: Urban Outfitters, Ears: Disney World. Before and during/after the rain

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2. Shirt: Delia's, Shorts: Urban Outfitters. Not even lying, this is the best photo of my outfit that day. If it wasn't, I would have spared you (but not really though).

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3. Shirt: Target, Dress: Zara

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4. Shirt: Disney, Skirt: DIY. Cheryl and I wanted to attempt to outdo eachothermatch, so we each bought pink Mickey shirts

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5. Skirt: Thrifted, Shirt: J Crew

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6. Romper: Asos Sale. That romper is covered in jukeboxes. I like thematic dressing.

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7. Probably the most important outfit of the trip - me, wearing a Belle dress made for 6 year olds

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Until tomorrow,